Thus begins the end of my Harry Potter journey. 4,100 pages. Damn. No doubt I will be sad once I finish this book, but for now I am excited and impatient to start!
I started this series last June. I was supposed to finish it by the end of summer 
Ch 1 – Well Malfoy family, looks like your house is now headquarters for the Legion of Death Eaters. Maybe you shouldn’t have been all in love with Voldemort if you didn’t want him and his snake living in your house and treating you like dirt.
How does Snape know the exact date/time they plan to move Harry out of the Dursley house? Who in the Order of the Phoenix could possibly still trust Snape after he killed Dumbledore? There must be a secret Death Eater amongst the Order. I can’t even guess who it is because I like them all too much to think any of them could betray Harry.
Ch 3 – Awwwww. Big D and Harry are finally getting along! Looks like Harry not only gets to save the world from Voldemort, he also gets to save Dudley from the callow egotism of a Dursley upbringing. I bet Dudley turns out aaaaaalllll right.
Harry and Dudley didn’t get along at first, but in the end they do. Just like Murtaugh and Riggs. This is how I imagine grown up Harry and Dudley.
Ch 4 – Oh. I forgot Mundungus Fletcher is in the Order. He’s probably the spy. F that guy.
Ch 5 – I didn’t expect Harry’s escape to go THIS poorly. Turns out Snape’s info was dead on. I still think Snape is on the side of the Order… but this makes it more confusing.
Ch 6 – Mad Eye Moody dying is supposed to be sad, but I’m a hundred times more distraught over the death of Hedwig. I really loved that owl.
RIP Hedwig. (In this photo, I am the sad baby owl kissing Hedwig)
Ch 7 – Ginny wants to give Harry his birthday present:
She took a step closer to him. “So then I thought, I’d like you to have something to remember me by, you know, if you meet some veela when you’re off doing whatever it is you’re doing.” … And then she was kissing him as she had never kissed him before.
Ok so at this point I’m thinking, O.M.F.G. they are totally about to DO IT! I mean come on, they’ve already kissed a bunch of times so kissing once more isn’t going to be “something to remember her by.” But then of course Ron walks in the room and ruins everything. Now, I never had a sister growing up, but I have to imagine that entering your sister’s bedroom through a closed door without knocking first is a SERIOUS breach of decency. What the hell man?! Way to ruin it for everyone Ron!
I’m a little nervous. I’ve been conditioned by Game of Thrones not to trust anything good to come from a wedding.
Ch 10 – So Kreacher tells a really intense story about Regulas Black and the Horcrux, the moral of which is: people should’ve been nice to house elves all along. Score another ten points for Hermione. (Side note: It sucks they couldn’t/wouldn’t put SPEW into the movies)*
Ch 13 – Another trip to the ministry results in another swell adventure. Never a dull moment at that place. Not only did they get the horcrux, but they freed a bunch of prisoners AND thwarted my favorite villain Umbridge. Not a bad little outing.
Ch 14 – …oh but it turns out they can never go back to Grimauld Place. Guess the ministry trip wasn’t all beer and skittles after all.
Ch 15 – Harry Potter and the Emo Camping trip.
They probably should’ve brought more cliff bars. And a french press – coffee makes any camping trip better. And maybe some edibles…
Was the plan to camp around for weeks until overhearing some key information from random passersby? Well, the plan worked perfectly! Good thing too, otherwise they never would’ve learned a bunch of important secrets like how the Sword of Gryffindor is a fake. Man do these kids ever get lucky a lot. (Except Harry that one time with Ginny. Thanks again RON)
Haha Ron has had enough of this camping trip. Ron is Cartman:
Ch 17 – Damn. A giant snake slithering out of the body of a decrepit old lady to attack Harry might just be the creepiest thing in this entire series.
Godrick’s Hallow really did not turn out like I thought. I figured they’d at least discover SOMETHING instead of almost getting killed and ruining Harry’s wand and gaining no key information. Way to surprise me JK Rowling. The mission sure looks grim at the moment.
Ch 19 – Well then, Ron is back, Horcrux is destroyed, Sword of Gryffindor is found, there’s a new wand for harry. Quite a reversal of fortunes for everyone in Chapter 19.
It’s like they were camping on the Titanic until Chapter 19 when they disapperated to the Spring Break party cruise.
Ch 22 – At this point in the book I’m starting to miss the fact they’re not at Hogwarts. Their adventures around the countryside are interesting enough, but Hogwarts as a setting anchors these books and now it’s feeling more like a Hobbit-style adventure from place to place. It’s a difficult change to accept.
Ch 23 – So after months of evading the Death Eaters, they get caught because Harry forgets about the taboo and says Voldemort’s name? Kind of a lame way to get caught.
I was really pulling for Draco to redeem himself and falsely identify Harry Potter as someone else. He kinda did. I mean he was too big of a wuss to say “No that’s not Harry” but at least he was like “ya, maybe, who knows?” Good job Draco.
Oh man, everyone escaped Malfoy Manor. When Voldemort shows up to find Harry Potter gone he is going to be so pissed. I hope he doesn’t kill everyone in the house. Also Dobby died saving everyone and Wormtail choked himself to death with his magic Voldemort hand. What a chapter.
Ch 24 – “Here Lies Dobby, A Free Elf” I want something like that on my tombstone
An eerie look into the distant future…
Wait, Dumbledore had the Elder wand the whole time?! And now Voldemort has dug up his dead corpse to get it?!! Eh, I’m not worried. If Harry had needed that wand Dumbledore would’ve given it to him. Harry can get the wand once he defeats Voldemort in battle and then he’ll have all the Hallows.
Ch 26 – I miss Crookshanks. Whatever happened to that cat?
Crookshanks, you just stay away until all the killing is done.
Ch 27 – Pros and Cons of Voldemort discovering that Harry is collecting his horcruxes. Con: Now he’ll try extra hard to save the last two horcruxes before they can be destroyed. Pro: it’s super awesome because Voldemort is all “WTF?! how did anyone even KNOW my horcruxes existed, let alone find them and capture them?!??!!!” Surprise, mother f***er!
Ch 28 – About to be captured in Hogsmeade and the bar keep was there to save them? I’ve said it before but man these kids are lucky af. Oh, the bar keep is Dumbledore’s brother. Woah.
Ch 30 – This preparation for the final battle is a real “who’s who” of characters from the series. More and more people keep pouring into the room of requirement. Even Percy Weasley. Looks like it’s about to be ON.
I imagine this scene is like Bob Barker calling out all the past characters to “Come on Dowwwwn” as they enter the portal into the room of requirements.
Ch 31 – Not a SINGLE Slytherin stays behind to fight?! JK Rowling sure does paint the Slytherins pretty poorly here. At least Slughorn stays.
I’m disappointed that Malfoy and his stooges try to capture Harry for Voldemort. I thought Draco had turned a corner when he refused to identify Harry earlier. Maybe not.
I’m also disappointed that a horcrux can be destroyed by a fire spell that a mere student can conjure. Seems lame. Oh well, the snake is the only horcrux left, I believe.
I’m even MORE disappointed that Fred died. But there’s almost too much happening right now to feel sad about it.
Ch 32 – I can’t believe Snape went out like that. Damn. Voldemort is cold.
Ch 33 – This chapter on Snape’s memories tho… He loved Lily Potter? Wow. BTW, I totally called that Dumbledore told Snape to kill him, I just didn’t realize it had been decided so far in advance. (Also, for a split second, when childhood Snape is playing with childhood Lily and Petunia, I thought I was going to be right about Snape and Aunt Petunia’s love affair).
“To give Voldemort what appears to be valuable information while withholding the essential is a job I would entrust to nobody but you.”
Turns out Snape is a badass.
“Death is coming for me as surely as the Chudley Cannons will finish bottom of this year’s league.”
Haha Dumbledore made a sports joke when discussing his own impending death. That’s how I want to go too.
OMG Harry himself is a Horcrux?!?!? No. NO. That is like, the most heartbreakingly ironic thing I’ve ever read.
This is me upon learning that Harry is a horcrux and has to die in order to destroy Voldemort.
Ch 34 – Harry’s long walk to the forest is torturous. Not saying goodbye to anyone. Seeing Neville and Ginny and Hagrid’s hut. Thinking about all the good times and how awesome his friends are. “The long game had ended, the snitch had been caught…” omg effing stahp. I’m not crying, YOU’RE CRYING!
Ch 35 – Oh good Harry gets to come back to life. Phew. Glad I don’t have to be depressed for weeks.
Ch 36 – Yasssss. Neville. Effing. Longbottom. I predicted way back in the first book that Neville, appearing so incompetent at the time, had to be gearing up to do something really important later on. But I didn’t ever imagine it would be so badass. Running right up to Voldemort and cutting off his snake’s head in full view of everyone. Neville’s metamorphosis into THE MAN is complete.
Well Voldemort has finally been defeated. Three cheers. I’m glad that Harry didn’t defeat him by being a better wizard or by knowing some secret spells or something. Outdoing the most powerful wizard on magic alone wouldn’t have been believable. The two times in the series when Harry faces Voldemort head to head, he only uses the very first spell he learned in dueling class, expelliarmus, and it works both times. Voldemort’s arrogance (a consistent detriment to him throughout the series) in his refusal to believe the Elder wand would answer to Harry leads to him using the wand against its true master. Harry was clever enough to figure this out but, true to form, Voldemort was like “whatever bruh, I’m awesome.” Oops. Harry wins, not because he’s a better wizard, but he has the bravery to stand in against Voldemort and trust the rest to fall into place. I am satisfied with how this ended.
I would have liked a little more falling action. Voldemort is killed and the book ends about ten pages later. Maybe fill us in on more of the aftermath? There has to be a quite a lot. Minor complaint.
Epilogue – Aww everyone married their high school sweethearts and gave their children terrible names. The epilogue was equal parts pleasant and cheesey. It didn’t really tell us anything interesting other than Neville becomes the Herbology professor and Draco is somewhat less of a dick. But hooray, everything turns out great and they’re all still friends. I’m glad all turns out well but… give me a seven page epilogue and there’s about 435 things I want to learn before knowing about everyone’s kids happily riding off to Hogwarts. Alas.
Final thoughts on the series:
It took me ten months but I’m now completely versed in the story of Harry Potter. Minus the new Fantastic Beasts movie. And the Very Potter Musical. And the Cursed Child script/play. But as for the seven books, I’m fully in the know. I really enjoyed the series. The first two books were somewhat shallow and not my favorite. But book three started to pick up steam and by book four I was enthralled all the way to the end. And those early books, while a little lighter on substance, laid a lot of groundwork and relationship building that became so integral towards the end of the series. But most of all, when you put so much time into a story, you want to feel satisfied with how it ends and J.K. Rowling did a marvelous job. Time well spent. I look forward to re-reading the series in the future and continuing the many Harry Potter discussions I’ve been having with friends.
This is me now. Kindof.
*A note on the movies:
I’ve been watching each movie after finishing the corresponding book and I’ve now seen all 8 movies. As much as I’ve enjoyed the books, the movies are pretty much garbage. Ok maybe that’s too harsh. Not garbage, but they were undoubtedly disappointing. The writing is so lazy. I understand that movies have to adapt the script to keep within a reasonable run time. However, so many key plot points and themes were changed and/or omitted for no apparent reason. These instances are too many to list and they all made me furious. I’ll give one of many examples: In the beginning of Deathly Hallows part 1, they take the time to show you the Dursley’s packing up and moving away, yet they don’t spend the extra five seconds for Dudley to thank Harry for saving his life? You have Dudley in SEVEN movies and then decide to cut the single most important moment in his entire character arch. And why? It would have taken five more seconds. But hey, they added a scene where Harry and Hermione dance in a tent for no reason at all. Again, this is just one of many infuriating examples.
The effects and the creation of the “Harry Potter world” are great. The acting is good for the most part. I didn’t like the Dumbledore but Alan Rickman is beyond reproach. The kids do a good job considering they’re kids. It’s just that the writing is so damn lazy. I look forward to re-reading the books but I doubt I’ll ever re-watch any of the movies.
Click here for my blog on Harry Potter Book 6, Book 5, Book 4, Book 3, Book 2, Book 1, or my Preview.
Brohemia 
Dan, I enjoyed all your comments! You added a ton of humor to the series, thanks a lot. Lee
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